Tom Gilson

“Help Me, Mom and Dad — Is It True What They Say About Christians Hating Gays?”

“Help me, Mom and Dad! Is It True What They Say About Christians Hating Gays?”

That is approximately the working title I used while writing the book published as Critical Conversations: A Christian Parents’ Guide to Discussing Homosexuality With Teens.  (Originally it was the overly-strong and potentially misleading, Hey, Mom and Dad — Is It True That Christians Hate Gays?)I won’t go into how it ended up the way it did — but if that title caught your eye, and if you think that question is worth your or your kids knowing about, then this is the book for you

If you’re a pastor you could substitute, “Hey Pastor …” More than 90 percent of this book applies to you, too.

Not all kids ask that question out loud. They’re asking it anyway.

Christian kids are bombarded with the message of Christianity being hateful, homophobic, on the wrong side of history, intolerant, and on and on. It’s scaring them away from the faith. Or rather, they’re turning away from Christianity because they don’t understand it’s a barrage of blanks: the charges against Christianity are empty.

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Who’s going to let them know the truth?

Someone who knows the truth. Someone who knows something about the history of the gay rights movement, and how these charges became so popular. Someone who knows that biblical marriage isn’t just biblical, it’s good, and the Bible’s stance on it is really, genuinely good for couples, kids, and communities. There’s nothing there for us to be ashamed of: our stance is a good one.

“Look, if there was ever an awkward topic …”

If there was ever an awkward topic it doesn’t have to be this one! Really!

How do you start the conversation? Not with “the talk.” Not in a weird way. Naturally. Like any other topic you’d talk about with your kids. Seriously. Once you know where to begin, you can do it in the car on the way to soccer practice.

But “is it true what they say about Christians hating gays?”

That’s an empty charge. I cover more than two dozen other common charges raised against the faith, and they’re all empty, too.

Not only that, but you can explain how they’re empty. Part 3 of the book tells you in extremely parent/pastor-friendly, relational terms how you can explain these things to your kids, clearly enough that they can explain it to their friends. You see, most of these charges are so empty, they take only a moment to defuse. The only reason they seem so tough is because so many people keep repeating them without thinking about them. You can help your kids learn to think about them!

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“Do we even need to have these ‘Critical Conversations’?”

Only if you want to be in on the conversation your kids are having everywhere else. Only if you want them to know the truth. Only if you want them to feel confident remaining in the faith.

But hold on — it isn’t just that you have to have the conversations. It’s also that you can build your relationship with your kids this way. You’ll know more about what’s going on in their lives. They’ll know that you know more than they thought you could know. And they’ll respect you for it.

They’re not just critical conversations. They’re positive conversations!

Frank Turek says, “You can read it in just an evening!” Isn’t it worth an evening to learn how to help your kids understand it isn’t true what they say about Christians?

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"Engaging… exhilarating.… This might be the most surprising and refreshing book you’ll read this year!" — Lee Strobel

"Too Good To Be False is almost too good to be true!" — Josh McDowell

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